Action speaks louder than words

Just a few days ago a friend of mine had the opportunity to take her relationship to new heights. After more than a year of being in an “unlabelled” relationship of sorts, her other half took it upon himself to profess his love to her.

Due to a rather tenacious internet connection and obstinate laptop, I was unable to share this story sooner. The extra time however, lent itself toward increasing my thought process on the matter.

In relation to my own experiences, as well as the experiences of many of those close to me, it seems that saying “I love you” has become such a norm that the words have lost their value. Driven by the belief that the relationship will only hold meaning once these words has been said has resulted in it being said far too early, far too often and has become meaningless.

Though this may seem rather pointless, it does pose a problem, especially in youth. The younger we are the more we yearn for something and someone greater than ourselves. We become consumed  with the idea of being in love that should another claim they feel that way about you, you find yourself becoming far too emotionally attached.

In the era of serial monogamy this problem becomes greatly exaggerated. As we go through a series of partners, each one claiming to love us, we start forgetting the real meaning of these words. We forget the true essence of what it means to ‘love’. It is easy to fall into the trap of monotony and soon a pattern develops. The words no longer carry weight and should someone actually say these words with all the correct feelings behind them, we bear them no mind. Sort of like the boy who cried wolf.

I understand that immaturity and childhood lends itself some leeway in the matter. Yet, what we learn in our foundational years sets the precedent for how we will live out our adult lives. If we start off using such loaded words flippantly, we will never truly appreciate their beauty when we finally settle down with a single person.

The act of love is just that - an act. It is not contained within the words and saying them robotically means nothing in comparison to our actions. It is what we bring to the table that truly matters. Romance as a bonus, the true meaning lies in how we build the other person up and vice versa. It is an on-going process that means little if only professed and not acted upon.

So why not wait? Why not hold back for the right person and more importantly why not wait till you truly feel that way? Saying you love someone shouldn't be part of a routine nor should it be mechanical. It need not be said every single day nor does every profession need to be accompanied by an “I love you too” (except perhaps the first time - no one wants a "thank you" following the initial profession).

Actions speak louder than words. If you can show your love every day, you need not say it. Some things are obvious enough and though verbal reiteration does help, it isn’t the only thing that matters.